To dye or not to dye, that is the question.
I've colored my hair since I started going gray in my early 30's. At age 46, I'm starting to feel like maybe I just want to go natural, but I'm really afraid of being marginalized like I read that all little old ladies are. Not that I am an LOL, but I think I'll be mistaken for one because I have gray hair. It's a crying shame that I cave to this social pressure, and even worse that it exists, but it does so there you go.
On my sister's recent visit, she lobbied for coloring my hair because having gray hair adds years to one's age. My husband is equally passionate that I should go natural, which is easy for him to say as his hair is only now beginning to go gray. I've always felt bad when I see a vibrant man out and about with what looks like an LOL by his side only to find out that she is his wife and his contemporary because I'm afraid that will be me someday. I already look like a wrinkled prune next to my sweet baboo because he has olive skin and I'm as fair as can be.
So, personal vanity and a desire to remain socially relevant are on the one side of the pro-coloring debate. The impulse to challenge social norms and to be accepted as I really am are on the other. Every day that passes has me weighing in first on one side, then the other.
Readers, what are your views on this age-old question?
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
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5 comments:
Whatever your choice, it should be for YOU.
Forget challenging social norms... NOT dyeing your hair for that reason keeps you just as oppressed by those norms, merely subjecting you to martyrdom. Why dye (or not) for society's sins?
To truly challenge the norms, you should choose to color or not based on what would enable YOU to feel most confident and comfortable with yourself. Forget about who the world wants to see. It's all about YOU!
If being a vibrant blonde is what puts a spring in your step, then just keep on springing along! :)
As for me, I'm enjoying the curly grey (why does that seem grayer than "gray") sparklers sprouting on my thinning scalp -- I figure that I earned each one of them. I think that trying to look young is a lost cause (and saps energy from other more interesting and enjoyable pursuits). The "youngest" people I know have gray hair, a few laugh lines, lots of energy and curiousity -- and vote Democrat!!! As an alternative, you could dye the baboo's hair gray at the fringes (you know the part that sticks out from the knitted beanies). SD
My problem really is that I don't know what I want to do. I appreciate both your perspectives!
Well, you could let it go gray. If you find you personally don't care for the color on you, you could just dye it again.
Having been one of those women lucky enough not to have gone gray 'til I was well into my '70s, I can join in the vote to go ahead and dye your hair until you really feel comfortable with nature's plan. Genes are funny stuff. Just stay a nice soft blonde which is so flattering to the complexion. There is no woman who looks older than the LOL who insists on dying her hair black. MES
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